The Wreck of Alberto Gonzales

The legend lives on from Great Falls on down
Of the waters they call Potomaci
The press they all say, never give up their prey
When “I can’t remember” turns gloomy

With a load of legal lore, 26 binders full more
Than Alberto Gonzales knew empty
That Bush pal and true was a bone to be chewed
When the need to remember came early

The staff was the pride of the Republican side
Counsel back from as far as Wisconsin
As the Plum Book staffs go, it was bigger than most
With a crew and the press flack well seasoned

Concluding some terms with silk stocking legal firms
When they left fully loaded from briefing
And later that morn when the gavel rang
Could it be the Ill Wind they’d been feeling?

The lead on the wires made a tattletale sound
And a flash broke over the swearing
And every man knew, as the AG did, too
T’was the witch of Remembrance come stealing

The date came late and the statement had to wait
When the calls to remember came slashing
When afternoon came with freezing refrain
In a mise-en-scene right out of West Wing

When deadline time came the old flack came on deck
Saying fellows it’s too rough to brief you
At 7 PM the main timeline caved in
He said fellows, it’s been good know you.

The AG wired in “There’s subpoenas coming in
And the AG and staff were in peril
And later that night when his lines were lost to sight
Came the wreck of Alberto Gonzales

Does anyone know
where the love of God goes
when the words turn the minutes to hours?
Reporters all say he’d have made Memorial Day
if he’d fifteen more Members behind him.

He might have stepped down
or he might have resigned.
He may have limped out in a totter.
And all that remains are the plans and claims for time spent with his sons and his daughters.

CNN rolls; Katy Couric preens
in a studio in Black Rock Manhattan
Olbermann steams in his Murrowesque dreams
His delivery and style are for sportsmen.

And later at night Colmes will opine
In refute of O’Reilly and Limbaugh
And the focus groups all go
as the politicos all know
With all gaffes from November remembered.

In a musty old hall on First Street they prayed
In an RNC strategy session
The email chimed til it rang 29 times
For each op-ed on A.G. Gonzales.

The legend lives on from Great Falls on down
Of the waters they call Potomaci
The press they all say, never give up their prey
When “I can’t remember” turns gloomy.


With all due apologies to G. Lightfoot: